*tries to open bag of chips quietly at funeral*

dontaskifimasian snacks, mothafucka!

(Source: meladoodle, via gnarly)


mom i have an unsuccessful blog to run i dont have time to do the dishes


(Source: greed, via co-ver)



Friend requirements:
1) if I accidentally put too much lotion on my hand u have to take half
2) that’s it

im always glad when this happened to my friend because i always forget to lotion my elbows

dontaskifimasian us. 💙✨👌
  • me when it starts getting cloudy: yeees
  • me when it starts raining: yeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSS


Hairdresser: do you like it?
Me: yes thank you

*goes home and cries*

(via stayyy-sassy)

Don’t act like you know me. I was meant to be alone.


[police officer] “sir are you in possession of any illegal drugs”

“sure thing son whatchu need”

(via scruples)

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